Sunday, June 21, 2009

The Worst Father Ever Imagined

"Eventually God decided to create a “chosen people,” and when they didn’t live up to his expectations, he let them be enslaved by the Egyptians. After a long period of pain and suffering, he decided to listen to the cries of his people. He chose a leader, Moses, to get them out of slavery. Moses succeeded, but the people rebelled, so God made them wander around in a desert for 40 years, until everyone of that generation died, including Moses (because Moses struck a rock with a rod instead of just speaking to it).

He told his people to capture the towns of other nations, to kill them all and their animals, but keep the virgins for themselves to rape. He would command them to make slaves of other nations. He even let them sell their own daughters into sexual slavery.

He made an entire book full of laws of things they were not allowed to do. They couldn’t touch menstruating women, they couldn’t eat shrimp or pigs, they couldn’t mix fibers for garments, they couldn’t kill their slaves — only beat them until they’re almost dead, and thousands of other things. It was an impossible list to follow, and he knew it. He was just making a point that they were worthless scum and couldn’t match his wonderfulness."

8 comments:

  1. Yes, and his followers still use the same methodology to track down and hunt witches today, a different sort of witches, but essentially the same -

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp_l5ntikaU

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  2. Happy father's day Yahweh you crazed old loony rascal and...uh...please don't smite my newborn twin daughters.
    THANKS :-P  

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  3. here let me give you the scenario -

    1). First there is the assumption of a wicked witch steeped in some sort of religion or ideology;

    2). they make a big fuss and make a lot of noise about the witch;

    3). than they find the only way to get rid of this supposed witch is to destroy her;

    4). they present flimsy and unsubstantiated evidence that she is a witch;

    5). they embellish the person by dressing her up like a witch;

    6). A false testimony is given ("she turned me into a newt");

    7). the administration of false methodologies on the assumption that she is a witch;

    8). The application of false measures (scales, or, the imposition of something without looking to any proven standard), as if they have applied some form correct official assessment;

    9). Finally they burn her.

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  4. As an aside TGIA fleming would like to be un-banned if that is possible. As I said before he would like to tell us why things should remain the same and about the invisible hand...LOL

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  5. Twin daughters? Congratulations, DJ

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  6. "Christ, isn't God a shit!" Randolph Churchill, on giving up trying to read the whole of the Bible for a bet.

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  7. That was just a joke at the space banker Yahweh! ;)

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