Thursday, May 30, 2013

Political idiocy & public nakedness


Announcing the formation of a FEMEN chapter since I’ve learned political idiocy & public nakedness do not violate public indecency statutes in Texas. To do that I’d have to do a lot worse than use my breasts as a billboard; I’d have to affront “current community standards of decency.” But aye, there’s the rub since who the hell knows what those standards are!? Victoria’s Secret runways? Men’s magazines on sale at every news stall complete with foldouts? Though God knows, the racism & Islamophobia promoted by FEMEN beat in sync with prevailing political standards.

Per the statutes, one can’t promote prostitution or pornography or exploit children but one can strut about or stand on a soapbox half-naked as long as there is no reckless regard for offending or alarming on-lookers--presumably many of them minors. Do you think a senior woman letting it all hang out on a soapbox would alarm anyone? Would 911 send a police van & cart me in for mental health evaluation? Or would they just let me stand there making a fool of myself & civil liberties?

What will I use my breasts & soap box to promote? Well FEMEN needs dough to travel about agitating (since they don’t seem to have gainful employment) so I’ll be renting out my chest to retailers who’ve always used women & sex to sell--like auto dealers, strip clubs, tool manufacturers. I certainly wouldn’t disgrace feminism or the struggle for human rights by offending the eyes of small children. That way too I can distance myself from the racism that characterizes FEMEN politics. Though I haven't figured a way to distance myself from their misogyny of playing up to men.

I’ll let you know how it goes but if I don’t show up for a while you’ll know Texas found their statutes inadequate to the political iconoclasm of FEMEN.

(Photo from Muslim Women Against Femen Facebook page)

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