Harry the Nazi

Some will say it’s wrong to kick a man when he’s down--but those some are just kill joys & not practiced in the art of warfare. Betty Windsor had big plans for this jubilee--to get beyond decades of “anni horribilis” & restore some dignity to a long-discredited feudal institution run by a mutant breed of indolent, racist bums. HHHHairy just blew those plans out of the water & the farce just keeps getting better. All those charity missions & mixing with the sweaty plebeians down the drain! More’s the pity! CNN calls HHHHairy madcap (amusingly eccentric is so damning) & rogue but give more attention to his party boy ways than they gave to him parading in a Nazi uniform & making racist aspersions.

Employment offers suitable for HHHHairy are pouring in & it’s about time: Playgirl magazine wants him to pose nude for their cover & a porno company asked him to star in a movie. The letter of invitation said,  "We assure you the sex will be well-scripted & the crown jewels will not be minimized in any way." In comparison to his brain they’ll look immense. Rupert Murdoch, who makes his fortune invading other people’s privacy, published the in flagrante photos while he advises us to give the guy some slack. But of course, HHHHairy’s ass will sell papers & Murdoch can try to make phone-hacking & invasion of privacy a matter of freedom of speech.

Did you know HHHHairy is still a full-time officer of the British army? The military plans on giving him a reprimand & encouraging him to donate 2 weeks wages to charity. Oh that’ll really teach him! To reduce his impact on the jubilee propaganda extravaganza, they’re sending him back to pose for photos in a fox hole in Afghanistan. HHHHairy holds a Queen’s Commission which is an officer’s commission (& the worst case of nepotism you ever heard) & an authorization from the British government to command troops. Eyeyey!  Anybody who follows HHHHairy into battle is a damned fool--which is why it’s probably best to keep him in the bars.

Last May, an organization of US war criminals, including Henry Kissinger & Colin Powell, gave him a Distinguished Humanitarian Leadership award for his work with veterans. (That was just at the time the UK was stripping 500,000 injured military veterans of disability benefits in the austerity budget.) Word is they’re cooking up  another phony award to give him; the ceremony will be held in the Washington strip club where they all hang out.

HHHHairy’s reportedly quite contrite & feels he let himself down. Many share his regrets though few his disappointment. With HHHHairy, ignominy abounds; shame not so much. All in all, if you have to choose between HHHHairy in a Nazi uniform or buck naked, most would wish he just went away altogether.  (Photo from Sun newspaper)